Tuesday, July 25, 2006

The Worlds Worst "Root Beer"

Yes, you read right. This review is for the Worlds Worst "Root Beer". Now, bear in mind that Root Beer is in quotation marks . The product I am talking about here is an attempt at something approaching a Root Beer by the brewers of Samuel Adams called 1790 Root Beer Brew. This brew is part of a 4-pack collection of their Brewer Patriot Collection. Calling this a Root Beer is an insult to every Root Beer ever made, hard or soft.

This "Root Beer"- I hesitate to even use those words in connection with this stuff- has nothing to recommend it to Root Beer or Beer lovers. The only thing you can readily ID in the aroma is Molasses and a hint of wintergreen. The smell is reminiscent of a 4-H sheep barn, where the smell of Molasses soaked feed mixes with the smell of various ruminants. It's rather unpleasant to tell you the truth.

It has a serious head that is yellowish over a light amber body and is carbonated decently. Being a "beer" there's no sweetness to the recipe. The flavour...well, the flavour is truly unique in the drink world. It tastes like an ashtray. An old, beer soaked ashtray. This stuff is nasty and the brewmaster in charge of formulating this stuff should be ashamed of themselves and they certainly should never have put the words Root Beer on the label. It's nasty by any sane standard. By Beer Drinker standards it is wretched. My resident home brewer and Beer connoisseur, (my wife, for whom the 4-pack was purchased) tasted this one pronounced it the worlds worst Beer as well.

Ingredients:
Water
Beer
Sassafras
Wintergreen
Licorice
Spices
Molasses
Caramelized Sugar
Vanilla

Aroma: Molasses and sheep barn
Head: Big, yellow.
Mouthfeel: Decent for a beer
Carbonation: Decent carbonation
Root Beer Flavour: None. Some molasses and wintergreen.
Sweetness: None
Overall: Nasty. This stuff tastes like an old, overfilled ashtray filled with bad beer.
Aftertaste: See above. It lingers.

Samuel Adams 1790 Root Beer Brew gets a nasty 0/10 and F-.

8 comments:

sunni said...

Kudos to you for completing the taste test—if something smelled of "molasses and sheep barn" to me, there'd be no way I'd put it in my mouth!

Michael said...

Sometimes you just gotta cowboy up and do what needs to be done. Fortunately, my wife tried the others (I took a sip of each) and I can state for the record that all of these so-called "Patriot Brews" should be poured down the drain before consuming. They would be better named The Patriot Act Pack as they all leave a bad taste in your mouth.

Anonymous said...

The beer is supposed to be a fermented version of early root beer. Comparing this to a soda is just plain stupid.

It would be like complaining that a Merlot doesn't taste anyting like grape soda.

Michael said...

Not at all. I've tasted fermented root beers, this one tasted like something from the wrong end of a donkey.

Anonymous said...

i enjoyed it. i have brewed my own for a while now and i thought it was a great fermented root beer. actually i thought the whole pack was outstanding. you are the only person i have ever talked to that tried these and didnt like them.

Vincent said...

Dude, you need to take a course on tasting...I don't think you have a clue about how to taste anything. Your reviews are whack.

R. F. Scott said...

Vincent, if you think this guy is whack, do not go anywhere near "Spike's Root Beer Reviews and Ratings" (http://www.rootbeerreviews.com). I sense the problem with both lies with their being unused to tasting the "real thing". Smooth to them equates to tasteless to anyone who grew up drinking genuine, from a wooden keg, draft root beer and sarsaparilla. (I found the brew reviewed above to be one of the best I've tried in some time, while the highly touted Henry Weinhard's, though by no means offensive, lacks any character whatsoever, truly the blandest root beer I can recall having tried.
Simply reading their reviews makes this apparent, some of the characteristics that they find most objectionable, are the very things some of us look for in our root beer, sarsaparilla or birch beer.
One thing though, nobody is wrong, it's all a matter of personal preference.

Anonymous said...

I REALLY enjoyed this root beer. I would go as far as to say that it is the best Sam Adams variety I've ever had. Cream Stout is a distant second.

I haven't had the beer since it came out, 4 years ago, and my taste has been drastically changed and refined since then, but if I saw it in the store again today, I would buy a 6 pack if they sold one.